Humanist Thought of the Week

Saying No

I get asked for my time a lot. 

I am asked to give talks, write articles, and respond to reporters’ questions.

Being in demand is wonderful. 

But like all wonderful things, it also has a downside.

I don’t have unlimited time or resources.

Every choice is a tradeoff.

If I accept talks on the weekend, I take time away from my family.

Every magazine article I write, takes time away from writing new books or programs for Humanist Learning Systems.

I find myself saying no a lot.

The more I say it, the more confident I am in standing up for my priorities.

It helps that when I’ve had to tell a client no, I seem to gain their respect.

Not everyone is confident enough to say no. Saying no is scary. It’s like closing a door. 

But I find it is necessary.

It allows me to focus on the things I think are important.

If I didn’t say no, I would not be able to promote Humanism and have a life.

I’d have burnt out years ago.

So please respect my need to shut down this podcast and join me in my newsletter, at Humanist Learning Systems and at my blog, Happiness Through Humanism.

Take it One Step at a Time

It is easy to feel overwhelmed. 

Having too much to do and keep track of.

I don’t know about you but as I’ve gotten older, my ability to remember things has decreased.

I rely on lists.

The nice things about list is that no matter how long my list is, it allows me to focus on one thing at a time.

When I get that done, I cross it off my list and move on to the next thing.

Taking a large task and breaking it up into smaller steps allows you to create order out of chaos.

You may have to change it, but you at least know in what order things need to happen.

It helps you regain control, because now you have a plan.  

Aspirational Humility

Humility is an important life skill.

It helps you acknowledge and recognize when you make mistakes so you can fix them. 

It helps you get out of your own head long enough to pay attention to other people so that they will positively pay attention to you.

And, it helps you cope with the vast nothingness of existence. 

Whatever it is you are worried about right now, isn’t a big deal.

It may be to you in the moment.

But in the vastness of existence, it doesn’t matter. Because at some point this problem will be over.

At some point you will cease to exist.

And if there are any people around capable of reflective thought 1 billion years from now, they probably won’t be reflecting on whatever problem you are dealing with right now.

That’s humility.

It provides perspective and helps you to not take things so seriously.

You should try it sometime. 

Persuasion

Persuasion is an art form.

Knowing how to talk other people into doing what you need them to do and agreeing with you, makes your life so much easier.

The reason most of us are bad at this, is that we are self-centered.

We want the person to do something for us.  

It’s all about us and our needs and our viewpoint.

If we could just get others to see the world as we do, they would understand.

Except that they don’t, because, they don’t see the world as we do. They see the world through their own eyes.

As soon as you understand this, you realize, the art of persuasion isn’t about getting the other person to agree with you.

It’s about you understanding what the other person needs and helping them to achieve their goal while simultaneously helping yourself. 

Wisdom is found in compassion. 

PS – I’m creating a course on how to win arguments by not actually arguing and it will eventually be available at Humanist Learning Systems.

People Power

Humanism puts humans front and center.

Our concern is for the welfare of humans and humanity.

We want a world where all people are able to thrive.

This means we want all people to have access to education, health care, housing, employment and the means of enjoyment.

Too many people are locked out of the economy and their ability to thrive is limited as a result.

Discrimination denies people access to basic means of survival.  

Whether it is red lining neighborhoods so people can’t get loans.

Laws that prohibit the hiring of certain people.

Or health care providers who seek the right to refuse to care for patients because of religious beliefs. 

When one person is prohibited from full participation in society, all of society suffers.

We are all in this together. We need all hands on deck and yet, we refuse to let some of those hands help. 

It’s insanity.

If we want to harness the full potential of humanity, we must empower all people to fully participate in society.

It is clear that the changes required aren’t going to happen on their own.

If we want society to change, we are going to need to do the hard work to make it change.

Power to the people, means people using their power to create change!