Humanist Thought of the Week

It's not about you

Meeting people where they are. What you want and need isn't necessarily what other people want and need. http://humanistlearning.info/livingmadesimpler1/

The Value of the Socratic Method

The Socratic method is a useful tool, not just for debate, but also to learn things. The Socratic method can help you be more professional and more ethical.
https://humanistlearning.com/socratic-jujitsu/ 

When is it ok to give up?

Online course: Planning for Personal Successis it ever ok to give up? Should we always persevere?

https://humanistlearning.com/planforpersonalsuccess/

Don't Fear Chaos

Uncertainty is unnerving.  

No matter how in control you feel, the reality is that underlying the universe we experience is chaos. 

And that chaos interrupts our lives all the time.

So we can never be certain. 

I liken this to skiing.

For me, skiing is the art of allowing yourself to be out of control. 

You are sliding on snow. Sliding!!!! 

And you can’t just put your foot down and stop, like you can when you are walking.

The first time I went skiing I was going so fast and I felt like I was totally out of control.

What you learn skiing is to be ok with the lack of control and to exert control over the slide where you can. 

You don’t have to be in control of everything and trying to will cause you to fail.

Relax. Don’t fear the chaos.

Accept it and exercise control where you can and you will probably get to the end of the run in fairly good shape and may even have a little fun on the way down.

Humor is a Nice Diffusor

I am a mom. 

Which means, I have a kid who sometimes drives me crazy.

It is at these times I am most likely to tease my son and encourage him to make better choices that don’t make me so crazy.

I don’t yell at him much anymore.

I figure if he is capable of language, he is capable of reasoning.

Here is the choice I give him when he is starting to drive me crazy. 

He can either have crazy mommy who reaches her breaking point and yells. 

Or ... he can have calm mommy who asks him to do things nicely. 

No one wants crazy mommy, least of all mommy. 

He always laughs when I give him this option and then chooses to comply with my request.

This is way better than me losing it.

Being honest about my limits as a parent and as a human helps him understand how he impacts others.

Plus, humor is always a nice diffuser. It reduces my tension and his and allows us to recalibrate our emotions so we can both make good choices.